Integrity, Soul Mates, Marriage Vows: #1

Adultery has gone prime time. Everywhere you turn, you see it swirling. And what we’re finding out is that it not only destroys lives, marriages and families, but can (potentially) destroy careers and end lives.

what will his affair (and the way he handled it) do to his career?If you look at my different platforms you’ll see that I’ve been writing about adultery lately. I’ve been getting some surprised reactions to my posts and columns. We didn’t think you were that conservative,” folks say.

What people seem to overlook is that I’m not advocating that people don’t change. I’m advocating civility. (I’m in good company today. David Brooks was also wondering about this.)

You need to keep your integrity and your reputation intact. That means acknowledging that you’re the person in charge of your decisions. That temptations are things we give into rather than things that rule us. We have choices. So when you stand before your community and promise to honor both your beloved and your commitments, you’re promising to honor your integrity.  as well. How you maneuver around those vows matters.

Tip: Your self reflection is your greatest gift to your integrity. We’re all tempted in our lives. And keeping commitments can be difficult and dirty work. But we made those commitments. If we’re going to break them, we need to do that along with the person with whom we made them. We need to face the unpleasantness as we declare ourselves unable to uphold those promises before we stray.

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