Whatever happened to the notion of a couple’s having a song? Back in the day, you had your song. You’d listened to it when you were courting. You’d danced to it. You’d danced to it at your wedding. When the band asked for requests, you always asked for it and then you danced. Did you know that that’s an excellent way to reinforce the love you felt on the day you married? Every time you take your partner’s hand and gaze into his or her eyes, you go back in time. You go back to when you first got together. You go back to your wedding day. You go back and then you bring forward the memories and the love and that makes marriages better.
Is it because we do so much parallel play these days, each of us with our ipods on full tilt boogie that we don’t have a song that we’ve listened to together? Wedding Priestess decries the habit of hearing the same darned song for a wedding dance while a couple shuffles around the floor obviously never having practiced this before.
- You don’t have to do a wedding dance. The people from the wedding magazines are not going to come and tell you you’re not married because you skipped something painful! Lots of people have danced to “Wonderful Tonight” or “At Last.” I’m sure after the inauguration we’ll see a lot more people dance to “At Last,” but if the Etta James classic isn’t you, why would you do that?
- If you have a song, practice dancing to it. Go ahead, take a lesson or two. A lot of people work very hard at their first dance. My Darling Drummer and I took lessons just like everyone else. He could sure keep a beat, but he’d always moved his feet separately before, one on the bass drum; one on the high hat! So it took a while! But we got there! (Our song is “Sentimental Reasons.”)
- If you don’t have a song, get cracking.
- Turn off the ipodsIn silence, sit and reminisce about your courtship. Has music been a part of it? Are there songs that make you think of your beloved?
- If you come up with a list, put some of those songs on the sound system and play them. Dance around a little. What makes you feel nuzzly and romantic? Maybe you’ve got a winner. (OK and maybe you just like being nuzzly and romantic, so you should play it a few more times over the course of time!
- When you’re at home together, play some of those songs. See what they bring up.
- Put them on your ipod, see if they spark the need to call your beloved when they pop up on the random play list?
- Choose a song to dance to that reminds you of you and your courtship and your happy days together. You’ll see it in your dancing. You’ll remember it through your life together.
Tip: Your wedding band should not be responsible for choosing your theme song. They don’t know you. But they do know “At Last” and “Wonderful Tonight!” So guess what they’re going to suggest. Your romance is your romance, it’s about you: your style, your activities, your great love. Your song should be about you as well!