Giving and receiving gifts around your wedding are to knit you and your community closer together. So, if you’re designating a charity as a suggestion for a wedding present or you’re choosing a charity to donate to in the name of your guests as a wedding favor, then choose something neutral. You’re gathering good will for your marriage. Getting everyone all cheesed off about your choice for a donation isn’t going to help you or get you the support you need as a couple to make it through marriage!
Tip: Once the two of you have decided what it is that you really care about, then start the discussion about which charity is appropriate. Not all of them are going to be. But everything that you care about will have a charity that is acceptable to everyone. Not everyone is going to agree with Greenpeace, but almost everyone will be fine with the Nature Conservancy or the Sierra Club.
Finding good compromises is a great way to build community and a pretty darned good way to build a healthy and happy marriage. Great work! And you’ll be building the world you want! How great is that?